Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
How's work?
Spinning.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
