I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
