just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
