If that was your dad, he is hot
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize