my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
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