You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
