He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
