Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
She tied me up with her honor cords...
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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