Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
