A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
