Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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