Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
where are you?
Hypothermia
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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