Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
