Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
