I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
