is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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