Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
