Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I skipped work to stalk him.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize