I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
