D3 body, D1 cock
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
