What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
