just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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