respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
