there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
