Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize
