Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
