I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
