CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
