I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Where is the hickey?
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
