Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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