if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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