and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
