My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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