What did we do last night that was yellow?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
