Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
