2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
