After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
