we're chasing vodka with high fives
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
