I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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