As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize