you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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