i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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