as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
