Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
My bed smells like the plague
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