went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize