You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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