69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
