I like to think it a success when the cops are called
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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