Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
