i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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