Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
